"Motherhood... A place in your soul you never knew was empty"
August 30, 2016
The journey is one of 1,000 smiles. You really blossom and learn what you are made of. You are at your finest hour, and at your most exhausted all at the same time. There are piles of laundry to be done, possibly a floor or two that could be mopped or swept or vacuumed. Maybe a bottomless sink of dishes to be washed from the day's use. Toys scattered from room to hall to room. A stack of mail/flyers/coupons on the counter that needs to be sorted. A bag of stuff you bought earlier that landed by the front door that needs to be put away... and then there's you.
Your best attempt at this glorified "mom bun", complete with days of dry shampoo (you have discovered dry shampoo by now, right?!) Your shirt or dress stretched out beyond recognition. Perhaps you were lucky enough to grab a few minutes somewhere in the morning to at least wash your face, brush your teeth, throw on some deodorant and run. (I'm pretty sure my once curly wash and wear bedhead, is now semi dreadlocked in my messy top knot.) I have not had an opportunity to take some for myself to get my mani/pedi, keep up with my highlights, get or give myself a facial, (hell, I consider it a mini vacation these days if I get to take a bath/shower alone and wash my hair by myself.) You are constantly On-The-Go, in a new way like never before. I catch myself running from room to room, when I think I've heard my little wake up from his nap - literally mid bite in my lunch. Its not enough that I shared my body with him for 9+ months while he grew inside of me, but I feed him from my body 8+months later.
And despite whatever I look like on the outside these days, I wouldn't trade a minute of it for anything. I may have puréed peaches and oatmeal dried up on my shirt, and I may not have my usual "face" on when I go out, (its a much simpler routine these days, complete with mascara, blush and some cc cream at best.).. but my heart has never been fuller. I have met my new best friend. Watching this new little human grow and learn new things literally every.single.day. is the most humbling experience. Having the privilege of being his Mommy, learning his likes and dislikes, coming into his own big personality.. its an experience like none other.
A love deeper than any other. I pause and look at him, and I'm in awe that he's here, looking up at me. What did I do to ever deserve a love so great?! This is the good stuff.